Yesterday morning, I witnessed something I desperately wish I could UN-see. The Great Hunter Dog is getting fixed next week. In what I can only assume was an open act of rebellion against the fixing, he attached himself to Stella. Like ATTACHED attached....see what I'm saying here? Thing is, I've SEEN dogs mate before. Or thought so. Turns out I haven't, because I seriously thought she broke him. All I heard was a lot of yelping (from him) and a lot of scuffling around in the kitchen, and when I went to see what was going on, they were attached. Rear to rear ATTACHED. In my KITCHEN. :(( :(( :((
At any rate, in my previous glorious ignorance, I thought something was wrong. Collars tangled up maybe? (Yes, I realized after the fact that collars were no where near the area of attachment, but I was a little panicked in the...ahem...heat of the moment.) Honestly? Because that's what I do here, I'm totally utterly honest, right? For a split second I honestly thought Stella's tail had somehow gotten lodged somewhere unthinkable, and I did my best to pry them apart. Then I thought to myself, and said out loud to them: "Wait a second...Stella doesn't HAVE a tail...." and at that point I just knew something was horribly amiss and ran to wake Ryan up so he could handle it. Around this house, I'm good for band aids. Anything worse than that, like loose teeth...suspected broken bones...severed limbs...dogs unnaturally attached in my KITCHEN...that's alllllllll Ryan. By the time he got to them they were UN-attached and acting normal, so he dismissed my story of horror and went back to bed. I locked Maxx in his kennel, juuuuuust in case.
I told my dear friend about it last night, and having been witness to the unholy happenings of dog-breeding, she promptly confirmed my suspicion that Maxx was indeed trying to leave his legacy before next week. IN. MY. KITCHEN. :'(
Soooo....in who knows how long because I had blissfully NOT been witness to such abomination before, we are apparently likely to have puppies. Weird ones I'm thinking.... Maxx is a muddled mix of Husky, Aussie, and Spaniel; Stella is a pure bred boxer. Yea.... try to picture THAT blend! Not that they won't be cute. Baby ANYTHINGS are always cute. But really....this was so not part of my immediate life plan...
Maxx is still getting up close and personal with the vet next week. I imagine we'll know one way or another soon if Stella is gonna be a Momma. Should that prove to be the case, I'll shamelessly post pictures and beg for buyers--fair warning. Three dogs is ENOUGH for me. And my kitchen WILL be scoured, steamed, bleached, and vaccinated, asap.
No comments:
Post a Comment