Tonight kind of did me in. My babies are crying on the phone when I talked to them, and it tears at my heart. I'm trying to figure out how to make these extra days we are here not so much of a burden on the people who are already doing so much for us by looking after everyone and everything back home this week. I want the answers that we came here for, and this waiting is killing me. Fear is creeping in and worry and doubt and I'm just starting to unravel a little.

I know tomorrow is another day and I will probably wake up feeling brighter and better. But tonight I'm just done. I can't do this anymore... I just want my life back the way it used to be. I want to be home with my children and I want to just live and love with my husband in that "it could never happen to me" mentality I used to have. Tonight I can't stand another moment of the fear that is starting to fill me again the longer we have to wait without answers. I can't stand the ache in my chest. This whole thing, this whole situation...it's not fair. It's not...and tonight I just can't do it anymore. Please God someone wake me up and make it all go away.